It's Okay To Live in a Season of Being on Pause


This blog post has been on my heart for awhile. Let me start by saying that it has been so much fun sharing our house building process with y'all so far. After so much time planning and working to make our designs come to fruition, it's such a reward to share our house updates with friends and family. I can't wait to share more now that we've finished the house and have moved in! (seriously, I have so many photos to share!)

But for a long time, David and I (and the kids) were in a season of being on pause. Almost five years, actually. From the moment David accepted his dream job in February 2012, we put the house we renovated (and loved!) on the market and had no real idea about what our next steps were in terms of our living situation. We bounced around to a couple of different rental houses (like this one and this one) and finally, finally, found a piece of land we decided to build a house on last year. And, here we are today. Five years later and finally settled in a long-term home. That's a long time to be on pause when you're talking to two type-A folks! In the past few years, my blog took a big tumble. I stopped posting as much and lost many followers, mostly because I decided to prioritize my family and career, but also because I was living in a rental house and simply didn't have the heart or ability to take on big home projects. Kitchen makeovers aren't quite the same when you can't change much about the kitchen itself! Needless to say, without much content... the blog sort of shrunk. 

But it's more than just the blog- I think I actually felt bad about myself that I wasn't making my home a priority. Just one jump onto Instagram or Pinterest and I felt this sudden urge to buy a new bed or hang new art or DIY a modern wooden plant stand. But I didn't, at least not often. And I felt bad about it. What I didn't realize for awhile is that it's okay to live in a season of being on pause. I'm not even sure that makes sense, but what I mean is that it's okay to not do everything. In fact, it's okay to not do anything. If you're not decorating your house so that it's Instagram-worthy or DIYing the crafts and the birthday parties and the etc. etc. etc. etc.- it's OKAY. Really! I'm not sure when we all got so caught up in the push for more. And I'm totally guilty of it myself, don't get me wrong. 

I'm sharing all of this now because I, truthfully, feel bad about being a contributor to that cycle. Again, I am SO excited to share photos of our new house with you, but I don't want you, by any means, to think that means that we're perfect or have it all together or live in some magazine-worthy home. Trust me, it's a gorgeous home we are so fortunate to live in, but David and I have worked really hard for it. Years of saving our pennies and skipping big vacations and hoarding away budget deals are finally paying off. In fact, we haven't bought any furniture in yearsssssss. And with the exception of our new breakfast table, we haven't bought any new furniture for the new house yet either! We'll buy slowly. On a budget. It's real life, after all. 

Hopefully I'm connecting with some of you out there. I just felt like sharing that in this season of buying and gift guides and what feels like (to me) a huge push for consumerism, don't feel like you're out of place if you're not participating in the whirlwind. Or, even worse, don't feel pressured to participate. I almost titled this post: Your House Does Not Have to Be Instagram Worthy. It doesn't. I'm seeing more and more likes on my Instagram feed and my blog statistics are (finally!) going back up, but I truly hope that's because you're connecting with me on a genuine platform and understanding our journey is so much more than the pretty final pictures. I would never want any of you to feel like you're not good enough or your home is not nice enough just because you're seeing so many pretty images online. It's okay if this is not your season for that. Maybe it's your season to focus on your job? Or your family? Or your physical health? Whatever your focus is, be proud. And truly embrace that season of being on pause with the rest!

Alrighty, I'm off my soapbox, for now. The last time I shared a house update, we had just finished the drywall. I've decided to fast forward three months and start sharing the full tour of the house from last week right before we moved in! Don't worry, I'll bounce back and forth and continue the details on the building process, I know a lot of you are planning a build yourself and love the insight. But I can't wait to finally share the finished product (like our keeping room above!), so stay tuned for the start of the tour later this week.

15 comments:

  1. Great post, Michelle. I think we all get sucked in to that pressure filled world of perfection every now and then. It's nice to take a step back and remember what is really important in life. Have a wonderful holiday with your family and enjoy the process of making your new house a home.
    Cheers!
    Shelley

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  2. Girl I think we are soul sisters... This is exactly why I haven't posted anything since Thanksgiving. I'm choosing myself, my friends & family, my health, and watching Hallmark Christmas movies before bed this year instead of spending hours of my computer doing gift guides for the blog. And it feels so good! And it's SO ok!! I'm so excited for you and your family. The house looks beautiful and I can't wait to see more!! :)

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    1. Well I knew we were soul sisters, glad you're finally in the know ; ) So glad you're making choices that are best for you and are making you happy! Man, those Hallmark Christmas movies get me every time....

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  3. This post spoke right to me. I sold my house in April and my (new!) husband and I have been living with my sister since our wedding. We are nearing a year now looking for a house and my blog (Jennblogshere.com) has defiantly taken a pause. I will live through your giddy move in posts until I can share mine :) Thanks for sharing!

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    1. Well a) congratulations on selling your house and b) congratulations on your new marriage!! and c) congratulations on the house hunt! So many amazing things going on for y'all! Glad you're focusing on that and just know that there's a bigger plan out there... the perfect house will come along at just the right time!! Happy holidays, friend!

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  4. This is why you are one of my favorite bloggers! I took a break for almost 3 years from blogging partly because I felt like its so hard to compete with everyone and their "perfect." I started again a few months ago because I genuinely missed it but I definitely have a different outlook this time around. I can't wait to see you work your magic on your beautiful new home.

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    1. Oh, thank you Courtney!! That means a lot : ) So glad you are staying true to your roots and blogging for the love of it!!

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  5. This is why I love you! You've always been true to yourself, but more importantly your faith and beliefs. I wrote a post not long ago, one of the few in the past several months, basically stating the same. It resonated with a lot of people and generated several fellow bloggers to post similar posts on their own personal blogs. It's about being present in the moment. Especially with family. Life is short. I agree that the consumerism of blogs and blog content has gotten out of control. I realize many are using their blogs as their soul income to support their families, but the excess is just too much!! Thanks for sharing from your heart Michelle.

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    1. I am going to go dig that post up and read it! We're totally on the same page. Merry Christmas to you and your family, sweet friend!!

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  6. Thank you for posting this! And I've stuck by you through the pause :) I too have become so disillusioned with bloggers I used to be excited to read, only to see they have become walking click-bait for Nordstrom or post DIY/home decor that has no practicality in real life.

    So excited to see all of the house pictures!

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    1. You have SO stuck by me, friend. I always love seeing comments from you, it makes me so happy : ) We've been buddies for so many years now! You know I try to keep it real, no Nordstrom craziness up in this place ha ha. Let's be real, I shop at Target and if things are getting crazy, maybe Old Navy. HA! Merry Christmas, Kelly!!!!!

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  7. I totally relate. I stopped blogging while we were renting and building our house, and never really went back. I have loved seeing your new home photos, it actually looks a lot like our home! I hope you share that stain color on the beams, its beautiful! =)

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  8. Great post, Michelle. Ive fallen off the blogging bandwagon too, I always have lots of ideas, but never get to sharing mainly bc of prioritizing time. With moving to a new state, its been a lot more focus on making this neighborhood a home than our actual dwelling, though that's part too. Making friends, creating routine, unpacking, settling, etc. I'm also feeling less pressure to make this house "perfect" but instead using what we have and making choices that reflect our style, budget, and timeline too.

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  9. Oh wow! Thank you SO much for sharing! This makes me feel much better about living in "Limbo Land" as I like to call it. My husband and I have been living in a 750 sq ft house since we got married 5.5 years ago. It was supposed to be a temporary arrangement (we own and rent out the larger house up front and live in this one in the back alley). It's been quite the experience with lots of growing pains and struggling with feeling content. We agreed we'd rather wait for the house we want rather than stone-stepping our way up. SO we finally bought 55 acres last March with a barn, tank, driveway, electricity & water already there (paid way more than we intended, but the land was hard to resist). Ever since then we've been saving up even more so we can start building asap! Even though our dream is getting closer and closer, I have nightmares that I'll never live in a "real" house again. That all our sacrificing will be for nothing and we'll never leave for fear of having an actual mortgage. But I keep telling my husband that I'd rather have a house that I can invite friends & family to visit than travel - at least for a little while. And if we don't have any furniture at first, I'll be okay with that! As long as we get out of our tiny home and can start a family. Finally.

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